Cutting the blab...

One of the few things I seriously hate about having little kids is talking. Maybe it's just me, but it seems that the life of a mother of small children involves a lot of blab blab blab. I don't mean communicating, I mean blab blab blab... constantly repeating yourself, reminding, reiterating, saying the same thing in 4 different way... it's exhausting!!!

What do I mean? I can ask an adult to go into the kitchen and grab the can of instant coffee sitting beside the kettle... and that's the end of it... I have the coffee 10 seconds later. It's nothing like the scenario of asking a toddler to grab his shoes and bring them to you....

(stop me if any of this sounds familiar)...
"Get your shoes"
"Over there by the door, you see them?" 
"Right there, See? Right there"
"Just walk over and pick them up" 
"Come on, go get them, we can't go to the park if you don't have shoes" 
"Pick them up, OK, good"
"Now bring them to Mommy"
"Over here, bring them to me... no, not to the kitchen"
"Come on.. over here... come over here so Mommy can put on your shoes"
(it all sorta sounds like 'blab blab blab', right?)

If you're ever worked a job in telemarketing or phone sales, you know that constant talking saps your energy even if you're sitting down all day. You're exhausted after spending the day talking away. It's the same with being a mom. I think moms would have more energy if we talked less. Does that make sense? It makes sense to me.

Last year while I was pregnant with my youngest, I caught strep... not once, but twice. That brought the grand total of the times that I've ever had strep to 2. I don't get sick often, so when I do, it's difficult. My throat felt awful. Talking hurt. But what??? I had two little kids to take care of. What worked for me was to find non-verbal ways to communicate with my kids. It was a huge help when I was sick, so I've actually carried this over to present day. It makes my life easier, so I am offering it as a tip to make your life easier.

I'm not referring to baby sign language, which I think is wonderful and fabulous, but more effort than I am willing to put in.

This is what I mean, my apologies if this sounds simple or stupid...

Shaking your head for 'no;' and nodding your head for 'yes'
Raising your hands with palms up for 'I don't know'
Waving your hand towards you for 'come over here'
Saying 'Shhhhhhh' instead of  'be quiet' or 'calm down'
Putting your finger in front of your lips to say 'be quiet'
Saying 'mmm hmm' instead of 'yes' or 'I agree'
Saying 'uh uh' instead of 'no'
Pointing to things instead of saying 'this direction' or 'over there' or 'that one'

All of these work with a little toddler person.

Another way to cut the 'blab blab blab' is to recognize traps that kids set to keep your attention and have you jumping through hoops and using up all your energy talking to them. The two common ones are asking "Why?" and "What it that?" There will actual times when your child wants to know the name of an object or the reason for something, but parenting expert types agree that most of the time kids ask these things, it's a game to keep you busy.

How do you foil their game? (assuming you realize that they're just doing it for a game and not asking something for real) It's easy, answer the "Why?" question with "I don't know"... that kinda stops the line of questioning in its tracks. Also, "Why do you think it's that way?" turns the tables on the kid and lets you be the listener instead of the talker. Kids love to talk!

Also, recognize that kids oftentimes know what something is when they ask '"What is that?", so turn the tables and ask them "What is that?" when they ask you and let them answer you.

Saving words saves energy, especially if you are repeating yourself all the time. I love my kids. There are few things I would rather be doing than taking care of them, but I try to live in my life in energy conservation mode.