Now that I have 4 kids, I know everything about having 4 kids

Mazal tov to me! Our 4th little puffball was born in June.... he was an addition to my collection of little children ages 4, 3 and almost-2.

Now that two months have passed by, I don't yet feel like I know everything about raising 4 little children, but I felt the need to distill my experiences into a blog post. I thought long and hard about what to write and finally realized that I couldn't establish any hard-and-fast rules about what it is like to have 4 little children. To tell you the truth, it's more like a series of paradoxical statements. Trust me, it makes sense.

1. Get help!!! *BUT ALSO* do it all yourself.

Everyone knows that famous people have the easiest parenting job. Why? Because they have someone washing their floors and folding their laundry and cooking 7-course organic vegan raw-food meals so they can watch their kids play soccer without a care in the world. They outsource the difficult stuff so they can enjoy the fun stuff.... it's a great idea! If you can afford it, get a cleaning lady. Get a mother's helper to help with the baby while you play with the older kids.. Take up any offers for free babysitting from sisters, cousins, nieces, neighbors..etc. Also, enlist your husband to help. Find out if a nearby highschool or seminary has a program where they send out their girls to do volunteer work to help in the community. The ideal thing is for you to spend quality time with the kids while someone else does the things that are less important.

*BUT ALSO* figure out a way to do everything all by yourself with no help whatsoever. Call me a cynic, but people will fail you. Cleaning ladies and babysitters won't show up. Friends and neighbors will flake out on you. Even husbands get busy with their own things. So yeah, figure out a way to be self-reliant and do everything on your own, if need be. With me, this involves some crazy level of multitasking... rocking the baby with one hand and feeding my 2-year-old yogurt with the other hand.... also holding simultaneous ADHD-like conversations with 3 kids at the same time. Streamline and simplify your routine to fit everything into a finite amount of time, just in case you find yourself doing it all yourself.

2. Give individual attention *BUT ALSO* make every activity a group activity

A mom with a large family (oy! is that what I have now?) needs to make a concerted effort to make each child feel special and unique. Every day, you need to do something to make each child feel like they are your only child. If a child feels loved and cherished, he won't decide to 'act out' in order to gain attention. To keep your children from feeling like they are lost in the shuffle, you need to carve out a space where your time and attention is focused on that one child and the universe stands still. Yes, I'm serious. If you are two years old, the universe stands still when you are sitting in your mother's lap and she is reading your favorite book... for the 3rd time straight.

*BUT ALSO* there is not enough time in the day. Sometimes, the only way that you will be able to get everything done is to include everyone. In my house, everyone eats together, bathes together... etc. Even though the new baby won't appreciate outings to the park or the Gymboree, I plop him in the stroller when he's sleeping and take him along... otherwise I would be stuck at home. Strollers can be comfortable places to sleep in. Also, I can't count the times that I dragged my baby chair into the bathroom so I could plop the baby in his chair so I could watch him as I bathed the older ones. You save time and effort and also you are gradually getting the new baby adjusted to the older kids' schedule.... one day when he is old enough to sit up, you will plop him in a baby bath seat and bathe him along with the others. If you live in an apartment with a small bathtub, consider what would be harder... doing separate bath-times for each of the kids or paying to install a new large-sized tub. If it was my dilemma, I would get the new tub.

3. Take it easy and give yourself time to rest *BUT ALSO* bounce back ASAP

Giving birth is hard, taking care of children is hard, so take any spare moment to rest and recover and take care of yourself. Nap when the kids nap. Nap while your husband is playing with the kids in the next room. Nap while your sister takes the kids to the park. You'll need your energy, so make sure to get enough to eat. If you are hungry, have a snack. You will need good nutritious food to keep up your milk supply and to help your body recover from childbirth. Forget about how some silly celebrity woman posed in a bikini on the cover of People magazine a month after giving birth or some hyper-driven CEO returned to work after she was discharged from the hospital. Take your time to recover and rest.

*BUT ALSO* don't take it too easy that you find yourself wearing the same maternity yoga pants for 5 days straight because you still haven't left the house. Any feelings of post-partum crappiness will just be exacerbated by not going out and by not taking care of your body. Losing the post-partum weight will make *you* feel good... there's no need to consider what the rest of society thinks you should look like. And imagine all the cute outfits you can make when you fit into all of your old clothes again. More importantly, I think that doing something active (even if it's walking to the makolet to buy apples) and getting back to your old self will give you energy (both physical and mental) to take care of your kids. Remember what Elle Woods said "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy"

4. You can't complain *BUT ALSO* yes, you can... just complain quietly

I'm superstitious, so on public online forums, I try not to gush about how wonderful my kids are... for fear of the evil eye. Moreover, I have friends whose kids have special needs, illnesses, medical conditions and such.... and also friends struggling with infertility. So yeah, out of sensitivity, I try not to complain because actually, some of the people who would hear my complaints would give anything to be in my shoes. I think it's basic common decency.

*BUT ALSO* find sympathetic friends (real-life friends as well as internet-friends) who are in the same stage of life as you and kvetch away. And if you live near me, come over for coffee and we can commiserate about spit-up and blow-out poopy diapers.

Did any of that make sense? I'm not entirely sure that my brain still works. But yeah... today was a good day. 4 little puffballs were fed and dressed and taken to school (for those who go to school) and picked up and taken to the park and put to bed. Everyone is alive and I have a little spare time to write things on the internet, so I guess it means that I did everything right and that I must know everything now.

Tomorrow is another day. I probably won't know everything tomorrow. :)

The one piece of advice every new mom with little kids needs to hear.

I have opinions about a lot of things, but unless you ask me, I won't try to impose them on you. I won't tell you what to feed your baby, how to dress him, how to get him to sleep or whether or not he will be traumatized forever if you don't let him have a pacifier. However, there is one piece of advice that I try to give any new mom who has small children...

DON'T BE A JERK TO YOUR KIDS!!!!

That's it. That's all I want to say. This works whether you have 2 toddlers when the new baby is born or 8 toddlers. It works whether your kids are 10 months apart or 2+ years apart. No matter what your situation, you will have an easier time transitioning your new baby into your family if you are not a jerk to your kids.

Let me elaborate. Moms behaving like jerks make the other children resentful, jealous and attention-deprived (and prone to misbehave to regain attention)... so here are three rules about how not to be that jerky mom.

1. Don't drop everything when the baby cries
2. Don't push developmental milestones
3. Don't throw the family schedule upside down

What the first rule means is that when two little people are crying for your attention at the exact same second, you give your attention to the older one. In all fairness, the older child was there first. More importantly, they will notice when you drop the knife in the middle of making their sandwich so you can pick up a crying baby. Unless it's an emergency, the baby will be OK if she cries for another 20 seconds as you finish the sandwich and hand it to your toddler.

What you are communicating to your toddler is that they are important and that you are reliable and follow through on the things you promise them.

What the second rule means is that you respect where your children are developmentally and don't force them to toilet train or sleep in a big bed or walk instead of sitting in a stroller if they are not ready. Nobody has died from having several kids in diapers or buying a double stroller, but forcing a child to 'grow up' just because the new baby arrived and the baby needs his stuff is jerky. It shows a lack of respect for the child's abilities and desires. More importantly, it sets the stage for sibling rivalry and territorial battles.

If your older child is still at an age where it's normal for him to sleep in a crib (Google it, ask your friend who have kids, look it up in a book), then buy a second-hand crib for the new baby or borrow one from your cousin. The baby won't care where she sleeps as long as it is warm and comfy, but an older child will notice these things and may fight even harder to stay in *HIS* crib. You might even hear about it for the next 18 years....

What the third rule means is to respect the family routines as much as possible. Kids like routine, even older ones who say that they don't. They need security and stability and familiarity. If you go into labor on Wednesday morning and rush off to the hospital, they will forgive you for not taking them to the Gymboree on Wednesday afternoon and making homemade pizza like you always do. OK, but once the baby is home, too many weeks without Gymboree and pizza sends the signal that your older kids are not important and that one tiny person's needs surpass the needs of several little people. Little tiny babies are usually pretty portable; feed them, change them, wrap them up and pop them in a stroller (or baby carrier, if that's your thing) and you are free to go almost anywhere and do almost anything. Getting back to routines and familiar family events shows your older children that nothing has changed and that life goes on as normal.... because it should.

I have heard people say that a new baby always comes first. This may sound right on an intuitive level, but in practice, it means that your other kids always come second (don't get me started on where the husband's place is!) and I think that's a recipe for disaster. Like I said, a baby won't remember that you waited to change his diaper to make your toddlers sandwich, but a toddler will notice. And a tantrum-ing toddler can ruin your afternoon much faster than a baby crying for 30 seconds. A newborn is very high-maintenance, but if you plan on having a handful of them, it won't be practical to drop everything for two years to make sure the new baby gets all the immediate love and instant attention.

Also, you want to enlist your older kids as allies. You want them to grab you a diaper from across the room or watch the baby so you can have a shower. You want them to love the new baby and not see him as a threat to their way of life. You hope that they will be friends with their new sibling when he grows up. The last thing you want is children who feel neglected. Kids are creative and can find all kinds of ways to make trouble to get your attention away from the new baby.

So yeah, don't be a jerk.

An overflowing laundry hamper is a happy laundry hamper

Kids need clothes, that's inevitable. We all do. I've been hearing a few things lately that boggle my mind... friends with small children talking about laundry... lots and lots of laundry.... needing to wash several loads of laundry every day... I don't get it. Let me go on record to say that it is totally possible to raise a family with three little children and not feel like a laundry maid.

My strategy is energy conservation. I'm not talking about hanging laundry to save on running the dryer, I am talking about saving *MY* energy. Towards those ends, I try to do laundry as infrequently as possible and smile as I see the laundry hampers pile up.

The truth is, there are two competing ideas out there about how to minimize your workload in dressing your children and taking care of their clothes. Hear me out, I actually think both of these would work... it just depends on what kind of mom you are,

The first idea is to be a minimalist... only buy a few outfits for each kid per season... something like 3,4 or 5 weekday outfits and a Shabbos outfit. So yes, you will need to do laundry twice a week, but the magic is that one washer full of clothes gets all the kids clothes done! The idea is that you are organized and you know that you always wash laundry on such-and-such day. You make a plan, you have a routine, your life is easier because you never have to think about when you will do laundry... you already know when you will be washing your next 400 loads. Also, you have less clutter in your kids closets and it doesn't take so long to put away all the laundry. I also think this idea is cheaper, since you are buying fewer clothes.

Also, your house won't be a forest of outgrown clothes in boxes and bags. The idea is that your kids have a few outfits that they wear each season (if you're clever, you buy pieces that mix and match) and when your kids outgrow the clothes, they've probably been worn to death and can be given a proper military burial because they have done their duty. (you could also save any clothes that still look ok, it won't take up so much space, since it's only a few outfits)

This also solves the problem of kids who don't like hand-me-downs or kids who have a totally different sense of style than their older siblings. Also, if you have a large gap between two kids, you may end up making the younger one an unwitting fashion victim if the hand-me-downs you've been dutifully saving have gone out of style.

The second idea is completely the opposite... to have 2-3 weeks' worth of outfits for each kid. As such, you don't touch the washing machine until you use up every. single. piece. of. clothing. Doesn't it seem silly to wash the same few outfits when your kids have other clothes they could wear? What's the point of having those other clothes if they never get worn? I don't get it. So yes, you let the dirty laundry pile up... buy another hamper if you need to.

Realistically speaking, you will probably need to do one load during the 2-3 weeks for socks/underwear/PJs... but you don't touch the washing machine if there is something clean (and appropriate for the season and occasion) for your kids to wear. I actually enjoy the challenge of trying to make cute outfits out of the last remaining clean clothing items.... and pondering the deep existential question of whether orange and grey and pink go together.

This is a great strategy for someone who isn't good at juggling many tasks at the same time and leaves a load of wet clothes in the washing machine for several days because she got distracted while she was doing laundry and then this other thing came up and then she forgot.. or if you're an 'all or nothing' personality type who has a hard time getting herself motivated to do laundry.

If you're a master bargain hunter, this strategy is for you... or if you get lots of hand-me-downs from stylish family members or if you like shopping and have the money to buy lots of clothes. The point is not to think about laundry all the time.... if your kids have clothes in their closet, then there's nothing to worry about. Also, when the inevitable laundry day rolls around, you will have an easier time sorting and folding... if you fill up a whole washing machine with only one child's clothes, you take them out and put them all in that child's closet... there is no guesswork about who a particular item belongs to.

Personally, I am a devotee of the second method. This was my strategy when I was in college... I wore every piece of clothing that I could wear before I went to the laundromat. And yes, I still do this for my own clothing too.... also household stuff like towels and sheets and tablecloths. Some people are minimalists in this area too... they will wash the same Shabbos tablecloth every week and use it until it's worn out and then buy a new one. As for me, I have a silly amount of tablecloths.

I think most women I know are neither the minimalist types nor the laundry-binge types
... they're always tripping over piles of kid clothes, but also it seems like there is never anything for the kids to wear. Also, they feel stress every time they see an overflowing laundry hamper... that's no way to live! I think it makes more sense to streamline your kids' wardrobes or to delay laundry day as long as possible. Either way, the name of the game is 'easy'.

Let me add one more thing on the subject of washing clothes, I love my dryer!!!! You couldn't pay me enough to hang clothes outside on the line. Sorry if that sounds snobbish, but snobbishness is not at the root of this disdain for line drying... line drying is more work! If you know me, you would know that I am a big fan of shortcuts, especially for moms with small children. Running the dryer costs money, but money is something that you can make more of... your time and energy is a scarce resource. If you wear yourself out doing household chores and have no energy for your kids, then your priorities are misplaced.

Like I said, I am a big believer in energy conservation.... you do what you can to save *YOUR* energy and don't worry about your carbon footprint.

When should you have your next baby?

I always see women posting on message boards asking “When should I have another baby?”…because getting advice from anonymous internet friends is the best way to make decisions. That’s crazy! Having children is a big decision, not to be taken lightly. 

No, you shouldn’t ask your friends on a chat board! No, you shouldn’t set up a Facebook poll! You can use logic and reason to determine when you should have a baby… and yes, a little math. If you can quantify all the important factors in your decision, then you can calculate the ideal time to have your next child. We’re not cavemen, we have logic and reason on our side.

Take out a calendar right now. Mark down today’s date.

First thing, realize that pregnancy will cause you to gain weight. If you are overweight now, you will be heavier when you’re pregnant. As such, you should be at your ideal weight when you become pregnant. Determine how much weight you need to lose to be at your ideal weight and start dieting ASAP.

-         Take out the calendar and calculate one week for every pound you need to lose. Skip any weeks in which there are Jewish holidays, family events or vacations.

-         If you are sensitive about your appearance, estimate how long it will be until your youngest sibling gets married. The most stylish and elegant evening gown just won't look as perfect on a pregnant figure or a post-partum figure (and remember, all those photos will be framed on walls and sitting in albums for the rest of your life!)... so if you want to look perfect in the photos, wait until your youngest sibling is married before you try to conceive.

Next, realize that new babies need stuff. You should have enough money to buy all the nicest trendiest baby stuff before you become pregnant. You cannot skip this step if you already have a crib, stroller, carseat.. etc (when your older children were born) or from a sister-in-law or neighbour… you must have the new and fashionable version of everything or else your baby will suffer.

-         Calculate 6 months to save up money to buy the best and most trendy baby stuff.. If you live in a particularly affluent neighbourhood, calculate a year to copy Jennifer Lopez’s nursery and Victoria Beckham’s baby wardrobe.

-         If you will look shabby pushing a fancy stroller with a baby in designer clothes, then calculate an additional 6 months to save to buy yourself a whole new wardrobe, fancy sheitel and nice purse… so you’re not embarrassed,

-         If your older kids will look shabby compared to the baby and his/her fancy new stuff, calculate an additional 3 months per child to revamp their wardrobes.

-         If your husband will look shabby standing next to your trendy-looking kids, calculate an additional 6 months to re-stock his wardrobe and find him a good hairdresser.

If you have children, consider their needs too. Taking care of a baby will take your time and focus away from your older child (or children), so plan your pregnancy accordingly so that your children don’t feel slighted.

-         If your youngest is independent, wait until he or she is in nursery school to bring a baby into the house. (calculate two or three years)

-         If your youngest is a little clingy, wait until he or she is in elementary school to bring a baby into the house. (calculate five or six years)

-         If your youngest is a very clingy, wait until he or she is in high school or goes away for yeshiva to bring a baby into the house. (calculate 13 or 14 years)

-         If your youngest is extremely clingy, you cannot bring a new baby into the house until the youngest is out of the house and married.

Consider your work situation. Remember that you will get maternity leave when you have a baby… what can be better than getting free money for sitting at home taking care of your child?

-         If you are currently unemployed, find a job immediately and stay there long enough to qualify for maternity leave benefits. (this varies by country)

-         If you are working for peanuts, wait until you can secure a raise or maneuver into a better position

-         If you work for a start-up, listen for rumors of an IPO and don’t leave your job until after that happens. Calculate however much time you need  to wait until the over-hyped IPO goes through so you will be an insider and will know when to dump your company stock options.

-         If you are an entrepreneur or own your own business, wait until you have enough revenue to hire someone to do your job , while you’re having a baby and for the first few months afterward. If you cannot find someone with your special expertise and skills, wait until they have perfected human cloning... only have a child when you can create a clone of yourself to keep your business going.

Something else to think about is education. If your child does not have the optimal start in life, then the rest of their life is doomed to failure. Find out which is the ideal pre-school, nursery, elementary school...etc for your future child. Also, pick a college. Do not consider becoming pregnant until you have confirmed that the ideal schools have room and until your future child is accepted into their program.

Once you've made all the necessary calculations, you should be able to pinpoint when the ideal time to bring a child into this world. Congratulations! You are making your decision based on knowledge and preparation, while most women only base their decisions on hope or dreams or faith... and we all know that those things aren't infallible.

Cutting the blab...

One of the few things I seriously hate about having little kids is talking. Maybe it's just me, but it seems that the life of a mother of small children involves a lot of blab blab blab. I don't mean communicating, I mean blab blab blab... constantly repeating yourself, reminding, reiterating, saying the same thing in 4 different way... it's exhausting!!!

What do I mean? I can ask an adult to go into the kitchen and grab the can of instant coffee sitting beside the kettle... and that's the end of it... I have the coffee 10 seconds later. It's nothing like the scenario of asking a toddler to grab his shoes and bring them to you....

(stop me if any of this sounds familiar)...
"Get your shoes"
"Over there by the door, you see them?" 
"Right there, See? Right there"
"Just walk over and pick them up" 
"Come on, go get them, we can't go to the park if you don't have shoes" 
"Pick them up, OK, good"
"Now bring them to Mommy"
"Over here, bring them to me... no, not to the kitchen"
"Come on.. over here... come over here so Mommy can put on your shoes"
(it all sorta sounds like 'blab blab blab', right?)

If you're ever worked a job in telemarketing or phone sales, you know that constant talking saps your energy even if you're sitting down all day. You're exhausted after spending the day talking away. It's the same with being a mom. I think moms would have more energy if we talked less. Does that make sense? It makes sense to me.

Last year while I was pregnant with my youngest, I caught strep... not once, but twice. That brought the grand total of the times that I've ever had strep to 2. I don't get sick often, so when I do, it's difficult. My throat felt awful. Talking hurt. But what??? I had two little kids to take care of. What worked for me was to find non-verbal ways to communicate with my kids. It was a huge help when I was sick, so I've actually carried this over to present day. It makes my life easier, so I am offering it as a tip to make your life easier.

I'm not referring to baby sign language, which I think is wonderful and fabulous, but more effort than I am willing to put in.

This is what I mean, my apologies if this sounds simple or stupid...

Shaking your head for 'no;' and nodding your head for 'yes'
Raising your hands with palms up for 'I don't know'
Waving your hand towards you for 'come over here'
Saying 'Shhhhhhh' instead of  'be quiet' or 'calm down'
Putting your finger in front of your lips to say 'be quiet'
Saying 'mmm hmm' instead of 'yes' or 'I agree'
Saying 'uh uh' instead of 'no'
Pointing to things instead of saying 'this direction' or 'over there' or 'that one'

All of these work with a little toddler person.

Another way to cut the 'blab blab blab' is to recognize traps that kids set to keep your attention and have you jumping through hoops and using up all your energy talking to them. The two common ones are asking "Why?" and "What it that?" There will actual times when your child wants to know the name of an object or the reason for something, but parenting expert types agree that most of the time kids ask these things, it's a game to keep you busy.

How do you foil their game? (assuming you realize that they're just doing it for a game and not asking something for real) It's easy, answer the "Why?" question with "I don't know"... that kinda stops the line of questioning in its tracks. Also, "Why do you think it's that way?" turns the tables on the kid and lets you be the listener instead of the talker. Kids love to talk!

Also, recognize that kids oftentimes know what something is when they ask '"What is that?", so turn the tables and ask them "What is that?" when they ask you and let them answer you.

Saving words saves energy, especially if you are repeating yourself all the time. I love my kids. There are few things I would rather be doing than taking care of them, but I try to live in my life in energy conservation mode.

Big wheels keep on turnin'....

I recently bought a triple stroller. It's a Valco Trimode double with an extra seat in the front. Why did I buy it? Because cramming three little puffballs into my double stroller was killing it. One of the wheels started popping off, probably because my three kids exceeded the weight limit of the stroller (40 pounds per seat), Some people told me that my oldest boy would start walking by himself once the baby was born, but they just didn't know my Shlomo well enough. He's the kind of kid who turns a 5-minute walk into half an hour. Stop me if this sounds familiar...

"Come on, Shlomo. Hurry up.
Don't pick that up. Stop it, put that down right now.
Let's go. Come on. Don't run into the neighbor's driveway!
Hurry up, Shlomo. We have to go.
No, that's dirty, don't touch that. Come on.
Don't chase that cat, he doesn't want you to pet him.
Put that down, that's not ours. Hurry up, Shlomo.
Don't try to open the door to that car.
Come on, let's go.
Don't pick those flowers.
No, don't eat those leaves. Put that down!
Hurry up...."

Don't get me wrong, he *can* walk. He took his first steps at 15 months. But the truth of the matter is that I prefer to push him in a stroller. Sure, most toddlers can walk... if you're OK with a 3-minute walk taking half an hour. Little kids want to stop to examine every car, run up every neighbor's driveway and chase every stray cat. And yes, you have to keep a sharp eye to make sure they're not running into the road. It's a little exhausting.

So yes, this is my parenting advice... don't push things!!!

Pick your battles and don't push your child into developmental milestones.

What I mean, is stuff like 1) keep your child sitting in the stroller for as long as possible
                                     2) keep your child sleeping in a crib for as long as possible
                                     3) keep your child in diapers for as long as possible

That sounds a little counter-intuitive, right? People say that children should learn to be independent as soon as possible and to do things on their own. Sure, right, I agree. But seriously.... the process of kids learning to do things on their own is sooooo tedious, I don't think it's worth it to push developmental milestones because you read something in a parenting book or because another mom in your playgroup brags about how advanced her kids are. Comparing yourself to others never turns out well.

It's sooo much more effort to push a child to do something they're not entirely ready for. And if you know me, you can guess my opinion about making an effort. Effort is bad. Easy is good. I would rather plop my oldest (3 years, 5 months) in a stroller seat than lose my voice yelling at him to walk. I've done my research, I know where I can buy a stroller for 6.

When my oldest was small, we shopped around for the biggest and tallest crib we could find. Why? To delay the inevitable moment when he climbs out of it and has to adjust to sleeping in a bed. Cribs keep a child contained and safe and out of your way. Once they start sleeping in a bed, there's a whole process of training them to stay in bed because they aren't surrounded by prison bars anymore.. and there are soooo many interesting things in their room to touch and play with and make a mess with. The bigger the crib, the longer your child will stay in it.

Keeping a kid in diapers is the same idea. Instead of coaxing them, pushing them, prodding them, bribing them...etc.. you let it go and wait until they're good and ready and do it themselves. I will never be the mom who wallpapers her house with sticker charts with a smiley-face sticker for every time my child used the toilet..... I'm the one whose kids they make the 'super jumbo' sized diapers for.

Like I said, I love my new stroller. It gives me great exercise pushing all three kids around. More than that, it makes my life easier. For the record, I bought it second-hand and got a faaaabulous deal on it. But seriously? Saving yourself a daily fight with a little boy who doesn't like to walk... that's priceless.

How to turn a long-sleeved shirt into a short-sleeved shirt without sewing and without it looking all dorky

It's finally summer, so I decided to take out my boys' summer clothes and put away their winter clothes. As I was folding shirts, I got the most faaaabulous idea about how to get more use out of some of the long-sleeved shirts that I was about to put away. I'm sure it's not an original idea, but this is what I did to make short-sleeved shirts... without sewing and without it looking obviously hand-made.

This is a good idea if you are low on short-sleeved shirts and don't want to buy any. Or if you're the kind of person who prefers your kids to wear clothes to death and then throw it away rather than to keep boxes of clothes to be passed on to a younger sibling. Also, it's something you can do if your child really loves a particular shirt and doesn't want to let it go just because it's summer.

Look in your kids' closet. Some shirts have arms made from contrasting material. I had a few of these. Any long-sleeved shirt with sewed-in contrasting sleeves can be made into a short-sleeved shirt in 2 minutes. All you need is scissors.

If you look closely, you will likely find that the shirt has a 'finished' short sleeved hem and a sleeve that has been attached on the inside. If the shirt still fits your child and if the fabric is lightweight enough, all you need to do is turn the shirt inside out and carefully cut the sleeves off. Don't touch the hem, just cut as closely as you can to where the sleeve is sewed in. The raggedy edge will be inside the sleeve and totally un-noticeable.

Magic