I recently bought a triple stroller. It's a Valco Trimode double with an extra seat in the front. Why did I buy it? Because cramming three little puffballs into my double stroller was killing it. One of the wheels started popping off, probably because my three kids exceeded the weight limit of the stroller (40 pounds per seat), Some people told me that my oldest boy would start walking by himself once the baby was born, but they just didn't know my Shlomo well enough. He's the kind of kid who turns a 5-minute walk into half an hour. Stop me if this sounds familiar...
"Come on, Shlomo. Hurry up.
Don't pick that up. Stop it, put that down right now.
Let's go. Come on. Don't run into the neighbor's driveway!
Hurry up, Shlomo. We have to go.
No, that's dirty, don't touch that. Come on.
Don't chase that cat, he doesn't want you to pet him.
Put that down, that's not ours. Hurry up, Shlomo.
Don't try to open the door to that car.
Come on, let's go.
Don't pick those flowers.
No, don't eat those leaves. Put that down!
Hurry up...."
Don't get me wrong, he *can* walk. He took his first steps at 15 months. But the truth of the matter is that I prefer to push him in a stroller. Sure, most toddlers can walk... if you're OK with a 3-minute walk taking half an hour. Little kids want to stop to examine every car, run up every neighbor's driveway and chase every stray cat. And yes, you have to keep a sharp eye to make sure they're not running into the road. It's a little exhausting.
So yes, this is my parenting advice... don't push things!!!
Pick your battles and don't push your child into developmental milestones.
What I mean, is stuff like 1) keep your child sitting in the stroller for as long as possible
2) keep your child sleeping in a crib for as long as possible
3) keep your child in diapers for as long as possible
That sounds a little counter-intuitive, right? People say that children should learn to be independent as soon as possible and to do things on their own. Sure, right, I agree. But seriously.... the process of kids learning to do things on their own is sooooo tedious, I don't think it's worth it to push developmental milestones because you read something in a parenting book or because another mom in your playgroup brags about how advanced her kids are. Comparing yourself to others never turns out well.
It's sooo much more effort to push a child to do something they're not entirely ready for. And if you know me, you can guess my opinion about making an effort. Effort is bad. Easy is good. I would rather plop my oldest (3 years, 5 months) in a stroller seat than lose my voice yelling at him to walk. I've done my research, I know where I can buy a stroller for 6.
When my oldest was small, we shopped around for the biggest and tallest crib we could find. Why? To delay the inevitable moment when he climbs out of it and has to adjust to sleeping in a bed. Cribs keep a child contained and safe and out of your way. Once they start sleeping in a bed, there's a whole process of training them to stay in bed because they aren't surrounded by prison bars anymore.. and there are soooo many interesting things in their room to touch and play with and make a mess with. The bigger the crib, the longer your child will stay in it.
Keeping a kid in diapers is the same idea. Instead of coaxing them, pushing them, prodding them, bribing them...etc.. you let it go and wait until they're good and ready and do it themselves. I will never be the mom who wallpapers her house with sticker charts with a smiley-face sticker for every time my child used the toilet..... I'm the one whose kids they make the 'super jumbo' sized diapers for.
Like I said, I love my new stroller. It gives me great exercise pushing all three kids around. More than that, it makes my life easier. For the record, I bought it second-hand and got a faaaabulous deal on it. But seriously? Saving yourself a daily fight with a little boy who doesn't like to walk... that's priceless.
